“When you are faithful in silent meditation… you will slowly experience yourself in a deeper way. Because in this useless hour in which you do nothing “important” or urgent you have to come to terms with your basic powerlessness, you have to feel your fundamental inability to solve your or others problems or to change the world. When you do not avoid that experience but live through it, you will find out that your many projects, plans and obligations become less urgent, crucial and important and lose power over you.” – Abbot John Eudes Bamburger

Some of my favorite toys when I was a kid were Weeble wobbles. “Weebles wobble but they won’t fall down!” For anyone unfamiliar, they were little egg shaped people who were weighted in the bottom to keep them upright. I could spend hours flicking them, trying to knock them over and amazed at how they always wobbled back to their upright position. I would try to lay them on their side, but they would just pop up again. In an effort to satisfy the amazement of their resilience, I asked way too many times about to my parents, I found out that their magic is in a very simple concept known as ballast. A weight heavier than the Weeble itself rested in the bottom. This was the secret to its resilience; the secret which kept it popping back up despite my bombardment to knock it down.

Much like the Weebles, we have an anchor for our soul, our ballast in regards to our hearts, who is the Lord. When we partake of solitude we are allowed to be in touch with the secret source of our resilience. We are afforded the knowledge and intimacy which allows us to trust the Lord, who keeps us upright. Even amidst the bombardment of what tries to knock us down, the Lord, as the ballast of our soul, is steadfast in returning us to our feet – no matter how hard the wobble of the moment…

In our solitude we come to know our self in light of God’s ballast. We come to know his power and our need for Him. In the quiet contemplation of solitude, we become aware of his consistency through all things. This is the place we know ourselves, within his provision. He is working in our lives, in all situations. He is complexly interweaving all things with all people at all times for the good of his purpose. Our significance, our accomplishment, our sustenance and our intimate communion with the Almighty are all dependent upon Him. Knowing the ballast for our soul means opening our hearts and minds to respond to who He is and how “who He is” interacts with who we are. As Fil Anderson puts it, “My responsibility is providing space for solitude and silence so that God may attend to the needs of my soul.” Oh, the comfort of the Omnipotent who attends to the needs of our soul. What an assurance to be able to depend on unending strength and intimate connection. We are relieved of the burden of change and are not required to be the driving force in making ourselves right in mind soul and action; He is. When we quiet ourselves to know Him more, He shows us exactly who He is. He is consistent in care, He is omnipotent in control and He is bringing our hearts near so that He can “attend to the needs of our soul.” We must open the space up to allow ourselves to hear Him whisper to our hearts. In our silence and solitude, our ears to hear and eyes to see are opened for his communion. And in this experience we become hungry for his presence. We become vividly in touch with our reliance on Him and our need for interaction. In this place we are more aware of his desires and the calm transcendent peace which only exists in dependence upon the Father. In the words of Job, “The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised.” This might seem cruel if we humanize the Almighty, but God gives and takes with sovereign understanding and calls us to quietly listen to Him, to trust Him and have faith; to rely on Him for sustenance.

As we wobble about in our lives, the ballast for our souls is known in our silent contemplative moments of seclusion with the Almighty. Knowing ourselves deeply as the God of the Ages reveals Himself and our true self in Him is the outcome of our silent times of listening to the subtle whispers of the Father. Let him attend to the needs of your soul. Open the space in your day to hear his gentle calling. Let go of the burden of the busyness and pursuit of trying to satisfy the needs, hopes and fulfillment of what God’s direction is for every avenue of life. As Paul relayed to the Corinthians, “Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day.” Sit back, relax and silently engage the God of the universe. He desires to whisper to your heart and satisfy your soul. He is faithful. He is satisfying. He is God.